` at a red light [Craig]

[Mia Testardo]

Mia was feeling next to miserable. She was lying on her back on the table in the exam room at her doctor’s office with Craig’s hand wrapped firmly in one of hers and an IV in her other arm. She was told they normally wouldn’t put an IV in someone right away, but because she was with child they didn’t want to take any risks since she came in dehydrated and weak. By now she was almost back asleep; she’d been sleeping almost nonstop for about a week now, but still had a death grip on Craig’s hand. Saying she was scared was an understatement. The last thing she wanted was for something to happen to the child she was carrying, especially if it was due to something that she could have helped. For a while she just thought she had a virus of some sort, and she had been a good girl and didn’t take anything to help with the symptoms, but then again, sleeping hadn’t been difficult either. Now, though, a week later, she was starting to spike a fever and wasn’t feeling any better, which led her to go to the doctor. Well, that and Craig, of course.

Before this illness, the pregnancy had been going fairly well. She had only been about four weeks into the pregnancy when she discovered she was pregnant, and both herself and the baby had been healthy when they went in for their first appointment. It was lucky that Mia didn’t drink or smoke… and that they didn’t go crazy with weird sex positions in the month before they knew they were having a child. Mia had been doing decently through the whole thing. She had only told her best friends and Cindy so far, and only because she wasn’t sure what the normal procedure was when an employee got pregnant. Well, that and the fact that Mia was back at work two days after she found out and was still spending a lot of her time crying and that never went unnoticed by her boss. Her symptoms were much worse this time than with her first pregnancy. Her morning sickness had been almost every morning, her breasts were so tender that she was basically telling Craig to stop messing with them completely because it just hurt (which saddened her), she was tired all the time (even before she got sick) and found herself waking at night to go to the bathroom. She wasn’t enjoying this, to say the least. She felt she was being hit with everything she had ever been told to try and scare her away from sex completely.

Something that hadn’t been too much of a problem as of yet was mood swings. Sure, there had been a few, but generally in a way that made Craig happier. She often came home from work grouchy and on the verge of tears if not crying already and then two seconds later she was pulling Craig’s clothes off. Their sex life hadn’t suffered too much yet. In fact, Mia was probably hornier than she was before she got pregnant and since she wasn’t yet showing, of course, they didn’t have to worry about that getting in the way. Of course, they were both being more careful about how rough they got and were careful to never touch her stomach, but beyond that, things were fairly normal, except they tended to stay on a bed now. Couldn’t risk her falling off anything of course. They were both doing what they could in order to be good parents to this child and she felt it was going fairly well for the two of them being so young.

Mia was woken back up when her doctor finally walked back into the room after a long absence. They had to run some blood tests and since she couldn’t leave until the IV bag was done being given they figured they may as well wait. Mia was about to sit up before the doctor told her not to worry about it when she smiled in thanks and rested her head back on the flat pillow, turning her head in the direction Craig was sitting and bringing his hand up to her face. His hand felt so cold against her hot, fevered skin, which led her to kiss it and move it away again, just as the doctor began to speak. Mia liked her doctor a lot. She was a young woman who didn’t try to lecture her and encouraged the healthy relationship she was currently in and always did what she could to help if there was a problem.

“Mia, I’ve got your blood tests back. They came back positive for mononucleosis, mono. It’s a virus and will go away in time, we can just treat the symptoms,” Mia sighed deeply and looked over at Craig. She knew what mono was, it had gone through her high school and Heather, a good friend of hers, was just now getting over it. Mia could only assume that’s where she got it, they shared drinks and forks enough after all. Her doctor continued to explain what needed to be done, but Mia interrupted with her only reason concern right now. “What about the baby?” she asked, her voice weak yet demanding. See, she was mothering… or maybe that was hormones. Or maybe even the unconscious fear that if something happened to their child Craig would want out of the relationship after realizing what it could lead to. “Mono itself shouldn’t affect your child,” Dr. Lichens assured, with a smile, “the only fear is the symptoms, specifically the high fever that is involved. We just have to keep that down and keep you eating and the little guy or girl should be just fine,” Mia forced a smile at these words and squeezed Craig’s hand, glancing over at him for a second before looking back towards her doctor so she could finish explaining how Mia should handle everything.

It was basically that she had to eat because the baby needed the food, smoothies and ice cream were suggested, something cold to sooth her throat, and sweat to encourage her to actually eat it. She was told to follow the directions on the Tylenol label and watch her fever closely. If the Tylenol didn’t decrease it they would have to try something else, but she was assured that it should work without a problem, and given some now to start the process. She was also told to sleep as much as she wanted, what to expect if there was a problem with her spleen and when to come back and told not to work, which she hoped Cindy would understand. She rarely called in sick, and now she had a doctor’s note. With that the IV was removed, she had already been ultrasounded to check on the child and everything was in order and Mia and Craig left, Mia leaning heavily on her boyfriend, eyes closed most of the time, expecting him to lead her safely back to the car. Once there Mia let herself into the passenger’s seat and collapsed, ready to sleep on the way home as well, if Craig didn’t have something he wanted to talk about quickly, of course. Long conversations would have to wait until she was starting to recover. “I hope you didn’t get it,” was all she said once Craig was in the car and they were driving away from the hospital. They had, obviously, kissed multiple times since when she felt she could have contracted the disease and she would feel just horrible if she had passed it on as well.

((Wasn't sure where to post this, but we can always move it later =] ))

[Craig Blackwood]

Craig was surprised with how well he had been handling the pregnancy so far. Not that he expected a pat on the back or anything, but with his commitment issues there was no telling how things would go for him. He was focusing more on the day-to-day events, rather than worrying about the future, which seemed to help. Whenever he did allow reality to sink in a little more, he couldn’t help but be a little panicky. Craig knew next to nothing about kids and was afraid he wouldn’t make much of a father, but he was sure going to try. Mia deserved his support and he couldn’t imagine leaving her to raise the kid alone. It didn’t matter how scared or unsure he was about this because it was happening and there was no going back now. This wasn’t a time to be selfish; he needed to keep his mind on the health of the child as well as its mother.

Things appeared to be going smoothly for the first few weeks of the pregnancy despite Mia’s discomfort when it came to morning sickness and many other symptoms that came with her current pregnancy. He only wished there was more he could do to prevent those things, but it’s not always easy suppressing nature. He was rather disappointed when Mia’s breasts became off-limits to him because they were too tender to the touch. He had really enjoyed pleasing her in that way and now it did just the opposite. Then again, it seemed like a small sacrifice considering their sex life wasn’t having much of a problem outside of that. They both knew Craig would never say no to sex, so the fact that her hormones were all out of whack pretty much guaranteed that they would be spending more than enough time in the bedroom for him to never bother her about it. He was better about that, of course, but there was always a possibility of him bringing it up if he felt he was a little deprived.

When Mia started feeling ill, Craig couldn’t help but worry. She told him she thought it was a cold or something, so he trusted her assumption and figured she would feel better in a few days. However, it appeared to get worse as the week went on, which is why he insisted she visit her doctor. Even if it wasn’t anything severe, it certainly wasn’t smart to take any risks like that while she was with child. He assured Mia that everything would be fine and that it was probably no big deal, even though he wasn’t entirely sure he believed that himself. It felt like an eternity as they were waiting for the doctor to come back with the results from the blood test. Once Mia’s doctor came back into the room, Craig turned to look at her as he waited for her to tell them the news. When she claimed it was mono, Craig was immediately confused. Normally hearing that would be a bit of relief since it wasn’t something more serious, but his mind couldn’t help but wonder where she had gotten it from. He had known of several people, including himself once, who had contracted it as teenagers and he knew of at least one sure way of getting it and that was what had him confused.

He studied Mia’s face in attempt to see if there was something she needed to tell him concerning how she managed to get mono. However, the only expression he got was that of concern for the unborn baby. Craig hadn’t been as concerned simply because the doctor didn’t treat it as a big deal and that told him they had nothing to worry about. He understood why Mia would panic a little, though. After what happened in her first pregnancy, she had more than enough reason to be concerned about anything she wasn’t certain about. Craig did feel relieved when the doctor claimed that the baby wouldn’t be harmed during the illness as long as Mia was taken care of. Perhaps he should have been focusing his attention more on Mia’s health, but he couldn’t help but be trapped by the idea that she could have gotten the virus by doing something he wasn’t supposed to know about.

Craig remained quiet as they walked to the car. He was a little stiff as well, but it wasn’t too noticeable, not even to him. He had never been that good at hiding his emotions and that was partly due to the fact that he didn’t realize when he was letting them show. When she spoke, he gave her a sideways glance and sighed. “Yeah…me too.” he said quietly. His mind was still flooded with mixed thoughts. There were things he wanted to ask her, but he was afraid of what he might find out. Besides that, he wasn’t exactly wanting to start a fight with her without really being sure of anything. Once they got home, he walked with her to the door, but still didn’t say much of anything to her other than insisting she should eat something and then get some more sleep. Of course, sleep had been a priority for the past week or so, so he couldn’t imagine her having a problem with that. Before they did anything else, however, he decided to at least ask the most basic question. “So, how’d you get it? The mono, I mean,” he asked, trying his hardest not to sound accusatory. He wasn’t sure why he always jumped to the extreme, but for some reason he couldn’t seem to help it. Perhaps he was afraid of losing her, especially now that she was with child. How could anyone consider him to be a suitable father, after all? It was all a bit crazy and part of him knew that, but he couldn’t help the jealous feeling that was slowly creeping up on him.

[Mia Testardo]

Mia had to admit that she was worried about both her and Craig’s ability to parent the child they were going to have in seven-odd months. She had been looking into parenting classes for the two of them, but a part of her was scared to mention it to him because she didn’t know how he would react. It wasn’t that he thought he would be a bad father; she just wanted any mistakes that were made to be minor. The first time to figure out how to stop a crying infant was not three in the morning the first day after bringing your new baby home. She really hoped his parents would be helpful as well, and not mind getting phone calls from her asking why they thought the baby wasn’t eating or whatever else. She was also very worried about the birth. Her first birth didn’t go well, and Lucas had been very, very small. Obviously, they were both hoping that wouldn’t happen again but it had hurt enough and her body had given everything it had just with that. This pregnancy was going to go better than the first, of course, since she now had medical care to help her out with it, but she would also like some sort of help preparing for that from someone who knows what to expect and how to help her through it. She just hoped Craig wouldn’t mind attending the classes with her. It was his child too after all.

When it came to their sex life, Mia was happy with how things were going for now, but she also knew it may not stay that way as her pregnancy progressed. However, she didn’t want Craig to just “suffer” in silence if things did slow down and he wasn’t getting much by way of physical attention. She didn’t want this child to hurt their relationship, and Craig did deserve to see how much she cared about him. She couldn’t deny that she might snap back with the whole “Craig, I’m pregnant!” thing if he ever did mention feeling a little deprived, but she was sure that she would try to accommodate him if she physically and comfortably could, and if the doctor continued to say that sex was safe for the baby, of course. If she didn’t, well, Craig was just going to have to live with what she could give him, whether he liked it or not, but they would cross that bridge if they came to it.

After they were told what was making Mia feel so horrible she felt Craig looking over at her and looked back. She tried to match his face, mostly because she wasn’t sure why she was getting the look in the first place and was trying to show him how odd he looked, but she was sure that failed so instead squeezed his hand and turned back to look at her doctor. It was probably a good thing Craig didn’t freak out as easily about the baby and its health as she did. She needed someone to bring her back down to earth, after all. After what happened with Lucas she wasn’t sure about anything and was sure that her doctor was getting annoyed with her phone calls, but she couldn’t help but be concerned. She hadn’t been ready to be pregnant in the first place and never had a chance to prepare herself for it emotionally. She just hoped that, as she got further along and the symptoms got less bothersome she was hoping she would worry less, but there were no promises there either. Though, she had to admit, Craig worrying so much when she stopped feeling well didn’t help, but she wasn’t going to tell him to back off. It was his child too, and that was something she was telling herself every time she felt he was getting a little overbearing.

It took her until the end of the car ride to realize that he may be thinking about how she managed to get the disease, mostly because it seemed so obvious to her, but how was he supposed to know about Heather? Sure, her friends sometimes hung out at their house, and Craig should know them if saw them, but beyond that she didn’t bore him by telling him about them, unless the story was funny of course. Either way, she wasn’t going to say anything about it unless Craig asked. She didn’t want him to think she was convinced he would be curious about it, like she thought he wouldn’t trust her or what have you. However, once they got back home, and he opened the door for her and all that, her suspensions were proven to be true.

“Should’a known you’d ask that,” she said softly, in her hoarse voice that proved how much her throat hurt, trying to joke and force a smile before jerking her head in the direction of the kitchen to ask Craig to follow her. She was going to get some ice cream, to keep Craig from trying to get her to eat. She really wanted to joke around with him, talk about how she should really just stop kissing Heather or, if she knew he had contracted mono before, joking about how she got it from him and turning the question around, but she felt horrible. She wanted to get this ice cream (well she didn’t want to, but she wanted to take care of the baby) then go and cuddle before falling asleep. “Heather,” was all the ended up saying right away as she tried to scoop herself some of the Neapolitan, which was her favorite before giving up and turning to Craig, handing him the scoop and asking him to get it for her. “She’s just getting over it; I must have shared a drink with her or something. I mean, obviously I can’t know for sure, but that’s my only guess,” she concluded as she stepped behind him, rested her head against his back and wrapped her arms around him, sliding her hands under his shirt and running her fingers over his muscled abs. She missed being physical with him, but she also knew she was too weak and felt too awful to try anything.

Once her ice cream was in the bowl, even if she had to put it there herself, she tried to convince Craig to come and sit on the couch with her, handing him the remote so he could choose what he wanted to watch, if anything. “Have you had it before?” she asked, a spoon with chocolate ice cream on it half way up to her mouth. Once she started eating the tasted horrible in her mouth. She wasn’t hungry, she didn’t want to eat and yet she had to in order to make sure her child had food. At least the cold helped her throat, but that was all she could say for the ice cream that she usually loved.

[Craig Blackwood]

It was doubtful that Craig would want to take part in any sort of class. He couldn’t imagine having the patience for it, but at the same time he knew that something needed to be done to prepare him for when the baby came. As of right now he wasn’t even sure of the correct procedure for changing a diaper, let alone anything else. For awhile he was thinking that it wouldn’t be difficult to learn all of these things in a short time, but as the weeks pressed on he realized that there was a lot more to it than he had originally thought. The classes seemed necessary for the two of them since they would be new to the whole parenting thing and Craig knew it was important to Mia to prevent any possible mistakes. The classes would probably help to put his mind at ease as well since he didn’t feel he had much control of their future at this point due to his lack of experience.

Despite having come a long way with controlling his sexual urges, it was still very possible for him to start complaining if things slowed down significantly. Of course, he really had no right to do so considering the circumstances and Mia had been generous about it lately. He had gone a few months without sex before, so obviously it wouldn’t kill him if they had to take a break from it to ensure the baby’s health. He has tried breaking himself of the habit of thinking that somehow sex was absolutely necessary to have at least a few times a week. Well, okay, he knew better than that by now, but that didn’t prevent him from trying. After all, they were having a kid and so having sex several times a week would stop being realistic after a while. It was going to be a tough transition, but hopefully Craig would have enough sense to worry more about being a father rather than how much time he was spending with Mia in the bedroom. It had been a little less than two years since Craig had abandoned his old lifestyle completely, so clearly there were a lot of things he still needed to work on.

Craig supposed it was never a surprise for him to ask about things like this. If he had the slightest suspicion about anything, he was going to ask about it and Mia knew that very well by now. The whole jealousy thing was something he really needed to work on, but so far he wasn’t sure how to help it. He did trust Mia, but after the whole thing with Jess, he was always a little concerned that maybe she’d find somebody better. The fact that Jess had treated her well and appeared to be a good guy was what had drove Craig insane. It only proved to him that Mia could easily find someone who was more of a gentleman than he was who would take better care of her. He had even thought about asking about Jess’s performance in the bedroom a few times. It was pathetic, but at that point Craig felt that was one of the few areas that he could best him in. Of course, if that had been true, it would make absolutely no sense to him as to why Mia was with him now, so clearly he had done something right. Craig wasn’t aware of his own insecurities until they had a reason to make surface. He wasn’t used to being in that sort of a position and he was also afraid of ruining what they had since he had come very close to doing so many times before.

Her answer didn’t leave him feeling relieved at all, which he hoped it would. It just seemed…odd. Either that, or he was simply too caught up in his own suspicion to believe anything other than what he suspected. Nonetheless, he decided to try and let it go. It did no good to start throwing out accusations when he had absolutely no evidence of it being true. He nodded towards her to acknowledge her answer. “Okay,” he said simply, hoping it sounded sincere because it was still bothering him a bit. A small smile came to his lips as she asked him to scoop the ice cream for her. He enjoyed doing small tasks like that for her. Occasionally he’d make fun of her for her inability to open a jar that he opened with relative ease, but he was more careful about poking fun at her now. He didn’t have much exposure to mood swings as of yet, but he had definitely heard about them from other guys, so he figured it was better not to risk it. Besides, he could also see how teasing her too much could get annoying no matter what condition she was in. He felt her hands on his abdomen and grinned. It would be a while before they could be physical again because of her illness, but he couldn’t keep the dirty thoughts from crossing his mind. “Is it sad that you’re turning me on right now?” he asked as he turned around to face her. He wasn’t expecting anything at that moment, of course, but for some reason he felt it was amusing enough to point out. Sure, it hadn’t been that long, but with how often they had been physical in the weeks before she got the virus, it was hard not to feel a little deprived.

Once they were in the living room, he sat close to her on the couch. He listened to her question as he was flipping through channels and turned to her to answer. “Yeah, when I was 17. Why?” he asked, not really sure why it mattered, or if she was just asking for the sake of having that knowledge. He knew mono was hardly contagious after a certain point, so the chances of him giving it to her would be very unlikely. However, she had already told him where she suspected she got it from, even though he still wasn’t sure he entirely believed it despite having no reason not to. After a short conversation between them, Craig once again insisted that she get some more rest since she seemed to be falling asleep anyway.

After about a half hour, Craig heard the familiar ringtone that came from Mia’s cell. Just in case it was her doctor calling, he decided to see who it was. As he glanced at the screen, he could feel his body tense up immediately. Why the fuck was Jess calling? What could he possibly want? Before he had a chance to throw the phone against the wall, he decided it was much wiser to set it back down. Just when he had started convincing himself that his suspicions were just plain stupid, here was a phone call that could not have had worse timing. As far as he knew, Mia hadn’t been speaking with Jess at all outside of work, so Craig couldn’t help but wonder what was going on. But again, drawing conclusions wouldn’t get him anywhere, so he supposed he’d just leave it be for now. They were still coworkers, after all.
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After a few days, Craig did what he could to no longer wonder how Mia got the virus. She had told him how she thought she got it, after all. It would be unfair to her to just throw that out and go on with his suspicions. It had been three days since the call from Jess and it wasn’t as if Mia could do much besides sleep at the time being so there was no use in worrying about it. However, as he was making himself lunch, he heard Mia’s phone go off again. This time he went over to grab it not because he thought it might be her doctor, but because he feared it would be Jess. Upon seeing his name on the screen once again, Craig had another urge to throw the phone at something, but again was somehow able to control himself. He allowed the call to pass before decided to do his own little investigation. He looked at her text messages, most of which were from her friends, but Jess’s name again caught his eye. After a quick glance around the room, he opened the message that read: hey, sry I missed ur call earlier. Hope ur feeling better :]. And somehow that was enough to make Craig’s suspicions seem very realistic. “Mia!” he shouted up the stairs. It was likely that she was sleeping still, but in Craig’s mind, this just couldn’t wait.

[Mia Testardo]

Mia did know that Craig had jealousy issues, especially when it came to Jess. She wouldn’t deny that it bothered her, but there was also little she could do about it. He was going to be jealous of the relationship she had while the two of them were apart until he was ready to get over it, just as she was after he had cheated. She couldn’t give him a time line and she was aware that he was going to hurt until time healed that. However, that didn’t mean his jealousy didn’t hurt her just like she was sure her lack of trust hurt him. But she knew it would pass. She was basically over the fact that he had cheated by now, sure, she would still bring it up in arguments and when she thought about it she felt the need to cry, but she didn’t think about it every day and she hoped Craig would get to that point too, hopefully sooner rather than later but there was nothing anyone could do to help speed things along and she knew it. She was just getting tired of changing Jess’ name in a story or feeling like she was unable to take a call from him around Craig. She felt that she wasn’t trusted, but things really were over between her and Jess. She just couldn’t find a way to make Craig believe that well enough so he could relax about it.

However, when hearing she had mono, she never expected Craig’s jealousy to surface. Okay, yeah, it was the kissing disease or whatever but there were so many ways one could get it, including just using a drinking fountain after someone who had the virus and got too close to the fountain itself. She expected a bit of trust out of him, especially since he knew that she and her friends were very close and didn’t always consider hygiene when it came to sharing stuff. This was why she didn’t think too much about it when he asked how she got it. She assumed he just wanted to know if she had an idea because, hell, if she didn’t have an idea right away she would be curious how this managed to happen as well.

Mia never liked how he would make fun of her when she couldn’t do something for herself. She wasn’t really one for chivalry and did enjoy being able to do things on her own without his help. She never allowed him to open car doors for her and if she got to the door first she would willingly open it and hope it open for Craig to walk through, but she was a woman and there were just times that a man’s muscles certainly helped with some things, and she wasn’t stupid enough to try to deny that. He was glad he avoided it today, though, especially since she was feeling so horrible and didn’t want to eat in the first place. When he spoke again she forced a giggle, but it didn’t come out as such due to her sore throat. When he turned she forced a smile up at him, her hands still under his shirt but now on his back of course. “Very sad,” she said gently, her hands sliding into the waist band of his pants. “’Cause you’re not getting any, and then you’d complain all night,” she said softly, reaching up and kissing his cheek before going back out to the couch.

After they were sitting and he answered her question she just nodded and took another bite of ice cream before saying why she had been interested. “I don’t think you can get it again, it’s a virus and all that, so… I’d just feel horrible if I gave it to you,” was the only way she could think to answer. That and, well, if he had it before and came into contact with the virus somehow he wouldn’t get it but would still be able to pass it on. Well, Mia didn’t fully understand that, but she knew something like that was possible. After some time and forcing herself to eat most of the ice cream that was in the bowl before resting her weight against her boyfriend as they talked. Well, mostly he talked because she didn’t want to and this was causing her to slowly drift off but before she could Craig suggested she head up and rest, which she agreed with, kissed him and left to get some sleep.

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Three days later Mia was starting to feel better, but still wasn’t feeling great and was still sleeping most of the day away. Jess had called the day she went to the doctor to see if she could handle the lunch shift the next day, and later that night Mia had called him back to tell him she was sick and wouldn’t be working for a while, but had to leave a message. She was really glad she finally had her own phone. Both she and Craig decided she needed one after they had discovered she was pregnant and she was already very used to giving it. She had told people, to call her cell instead of the house she shared with Craig and was getting used to this texting thing. It also helped with Jess when he would have to call her about work. She had always been worried Craig would figure out who that was and she would have to explain and now she didn’t think she had to worry. It wasn’t like she was doing anything wrong, but with Craig’s jealousy she didn’t want to have to explain why she wasn’t wrong. Now she figured she had the privacy of her own phone calls and conversations, which certainly felt right.

Now she was sleeping gently in bed. Craig had woken her when he got out of bed in the morning but she had sense fallen back asleep and was thankful for that. She was very comfortable and hadn’t had to run out of bed yet that morning to deal with annoying pregnancy symptoms so she couldn’t exactly complain about it as of yet. Suddenly she was woken by her named being screeched up the stairs. She moaned gently and turned over in bed before deciding he sounded rather urgent and may need her right away. She groaned as she pulled herself out of the bed. She adjusted the t-shirt of Craig’s she had been wearing to bed so it was straight on her body and pulled the blue plaid fabric of her left pajama pant leg down when it didn’t fall when she shook her leg before heading down the stairs, not even bothering with making herself look good. Craig could deal with it as far as she was concerned.

“What is it?” she asked when she saw him, flopping down in a dining room chair the second she reached it. Her voice was still fairly hoarse, but it was getting better. “This better be important, I was sleeping,” she looked at him for a second before seeing her phone in his hand, which confused her. He would know better than to look through her phone, or even her purse, right? Not like there was anything on the phone she didn’t want him seeing, but it was her phone, he didn’t have the right to go looking through it in her mind, and she respected the privacy of his phone as well. “Did someone call?” she asked, nodding towards the phone and pushing hair from her face, which was insanely messy at the moment, but she didn’t care about that either.

[Craig Blackwood]

“Not all night,” he corrected with a grin on his face. He at least knew better than to beg for sex when Mia was feeling as terrible as she was. It was unfortunate that he still hadn’t learned a lot of patience beyond that, but he was making an effort at least. After she again voiced her concern about possibly giving him the virus, he shrugged slightly. “Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you didn’t,” he tried to assure her. Craig couldn’t claim he knew a whole lot about the virus, but he had heard a lot of things from people who had had it. He knew that he had gotten it from making out with someone because, well, that just seemed obvious considering his habits at the time. He knew there were other ways of contracting the virus, but the one that immediately sprang to mind was through kissing. He couldn’t think of any way that he could have gotten it, so he couldn’t help but wonder if there was someone else in the picture that he wasn’t supposed to know about. It was rather extreme and perhaps a bit stupid, but this wasn’t the first time he let his jealousy take control of his thoughts.

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He stood near the bottom of the staircase as he waited for Mia to come down. It didn’t make much sense to shout her name again until he was sure it hadn’t waken her up the first time. Of course, there wasn’t much sense in yelling in the first place, but hell, he was angry. He clutched the phone a bit tighter as he watched her make her way down the stairs. Once she had sat down, he walked over and sat in the chair nearest to her. “Yeah, someone did,” he said flatly, but wasn’t handing her the phone. “You know, for a while I ignored it, figured it was nothing, but now I’m not so sure,” he said with his voice raised slightly. He sat back in his chair and gave a quick sigh. With that, he tossed the phone on the table so that she could pick it up. “It was Jess. It always is,” he said as he glared over at her. Okay, maybe he was exaggerating…maybe just a little. He rarely made complete sense when he was jealous and angry, so what could you expect?

Craig certainly didn’t have a right to go through Mia’s phone. She had every right to keep certain things private. Now, every once and a while he would take her phone to her if she was in the other room while it started ringing and he would often see who it was because he figured it was useful to let her know in case she didn’t care to answer it or whatever else. This time, however, Craig had obviously taken it too far. He hadn’t looked at her phone that day with the intention of seeing whether it was her doctor calling or someone else that might have something important to tell her. His intention as soon as he heard the ringtone was to see if Jess was calling again. It still wasn’t clear how exactly he came to the conclusions that he had, but for whatever reason he felt there was something going on between Jess and Mia. If this turned out to be true, he had a feeling that Jess was responsible for it. Craig knew he’d want Mia back if he thought he had a chance and perhaps that’s how the kiss happened. Well, the kiss Craig made up in his head anyhow.

“I’m starting to have other ideas of how you got mono, and it certainly doesn’t involve sharing a drink with somebody,” he said, being rather frank with his accusations and awfully unfair as well. He was yet again blinded by his own jealousy and that caused him to start with the crazy accusations. He was letting his own insecurities about the relationship escape into situations where it simply didn’t belong. For the past few months, Craig was having an extremely hard time getting over the fact that Mia had been with Jess. He never really talked to her about it at length, but he figured that wasn’t really something they could talk about without here becoming a problem. Craig couldn’t stand so much as hearing Jess’s name out loud, so it was still very difficult knowing that he was one of Mia’s coworkers. Now it seemed as though it would have been better if they had talked about it more since letting his feelings build up like he had were clearly backfiring majorly, as could have been predicted. If he took a moment to think about it, he would perhaps realize that his fear of losing her could likely cause that very thing to happen.

As if it wasn’t obvious enough, he decided to ask the question that was already implied. “So what’s going on with you two?” he said, this time sounding less accusatory and more as if he was simply curious. It was never wise for him to bring up a subject like this when he wasn’t doing much more than reacting to the fact that Jess was calling her again and had left her a text message or two. He really needed to take time to think about these things before he made it an issue. This was an overreaction at best and it was fairly obvious, but with how much the whole thing with Jess had been bothering him, this was bound to come out in some way or another. It was just unfortunate it was over something so silly.

[Mia Testardo]

When Craig started his little rant Mia just raised an eyebrow, obviously very confused. What the hell was he talking about? None of it made any sense as Mia tried to think about what he could be referring to. He had to know something she didn’t, right? Or he was just losing his mind… she was going to bet on the latter. Mia couldn’t help but wince slightly when he tossed the phone at her. Not like she thought he would try to hit her with it or something, he had never laid a mean hand on her, and it better stay that way as well, but having something hard flung in your direction in such a way that it wasn’t meant to be caught would be slightly frightening. When it landed on the table close to her she reached over to pick it up and saw it flashing “one missed call” at her, which she checked to find it had been Jess. She still didn’t quite connect what the problem was from that, but looked up as he spoke again. She had to admit, she was still confused. Yeah, Jess called her, so what? He had also called her before they had dated and before she and Craig had broken up.

“So?” she questioned softly, as she made sure Jess hadn’t left her a message, which he hadn’t. He would probably text whatever he had to tell her, everyone knew she rarely checked messages and would rather get a text. She still didn’t quite get what Craig’s problem was. Her boss was calling her, sounded pretty normal, and he only called in regards to work. She wasn’t sure if he still wanted to be with her or anything like that, but either way he had respected boundaries since they broke up. A few glares towards Craig when he would show up at the restaurant to pick her up and, right away, always having someone else go over to tell her something but things were better now. Sure, she knew Craig didn’t like to hear of him and all that but she honestly didn’t understand why he was having problems with Jess calling her. She knew women called him from time to time and she didn’t bother with it too much. Well, okay, she listened to the conversations much more closely, but beyond that…

“You’re right, it was frozen lemonade,” she said with a shrug of her shoulders after he accused her of not telling the truth about how she got mono. “Sorry, I didn’t tell you, didn’t realize it was so important.” The day after Mia had confirmed the diagnoses at her doctor she had talked to Heather over IM and they thought back about it and realized that the day before Heather started having symptoms she had stopped by the house Craig and Mia shared with a cup of frozen lemonade she bought on the street, which Mia happily helped herself to, using the same spoon. As to how Heather managed to get it, well, that was her business, but let’s just say she didn’t know who to contact to tell them to go get tested. Hey, she was single. At least now she managed to understand what was upsetting him so much, but that didn’t help her mood. So, he seriously thought that she got mono from Jess? She at least hoped that if he would accuse her of cheating he would be a little more original than to say she was cheating with her ex.

“He’s my boss,” was all Mia said right away, running a hand through her hair as she tried to come up with a way to explain this that wouldn’t cause things to be any worse than they already were. Yeah, she was pissed that he didn’t trust her but getting mad at him now, or getting defensive, wasn’t going to help the situation. She had never done anything to make Craig question her faithfulness and that’s what hurt so much. He was asking about this simply because there were calls on her phone from her ex-boyfriend. Sure, that would be pretty accusatory if she didn’t still work with him, but she did so she didn’t see the problem, but apparently Craig did have a problem with it, and that’s what made it tough. “He’s calling to ask about shifts or seeing when I’ll be able to come back to work so he can make up the schedule,” she sighed deeply and glanced down to the phone once again. She was going to have to do a better job keeping this thing close to her if Craig was going to start questioning the calls she was getting. There wasn’t anything she was getting that should be questioned, in her mind, but obviously Craig was getting curious and she didn’t think it was worth this. She just wanted to go back to bed. She still wasn’t feeling well.

“Babe I…” she paused for a second and looked down at her phone as it gave the ring tone of a text message. She continued to talk as she slid the phone open to check the text. “I don’t know what I did to make you even think this. What… what did I do to make you not trust me? I’m sorry I got mono,” she said, kind of making fun of him for acting as if she had a choice in the matter, “but I did get it from Heather. So… unless you’re worried that I’m fucking Heather I don’t get why you’re so upset,” she said with a sigh as she looked down at the phone. It was Jess, as she had expected, just asking how she was and if she knew if she would be back to work this next week. She figured she should wait to respond so slid the phone closed again and set it down beside her as she looked towards Craig, leaning an elbow on the table and then a hand on her elbow. Yeah, she was a little annoyed, who wouldn’t be? But she was going to do her best to just assure Craig for the time being. She didn’t want to fight with the father of her child when she felt so bad. That hadn’t been her hope for the day.

[Craig Blackwood]

Craig never took the time to try and understand his blind hatred for Jess. Well, he understood why he hated Jess, but never questioned whether it was reasonable, that is. As far as he was concerned, any man that slept with Mia or even touched her in ways that only Craig felt he had the right to he was going to hate. It didn’t matter what type of guy he was. Jess could be the most sensitive, selfless person in the world who rescued babies and puppies from burning buildings every chance he got and it still wouldn’t matter. In fact, that would probably only make it worse because there was no possible way for Craig to compete with that. Threatened was probably the best word to describe how Craig felt. There was no reason for him to be, but that hadn’t stopped him from his blind fits of jealousy before. If it were left up to him, he would force either Mia or Jess to find a new job across town just to put his mind at ease. Fortunately, it wasn’t up to him.

It annoyed him when she gave him a blank look. There was no reason for her to know what he was talking about in that moment, but he somehow felt that she should. He just couldn’t understand why it wasn’t obvious. “So? So?!” he repeated, as if the words were supposed to force her into understanding. He wasn’t sure exactly how to react to her simple response. She was hardly defensive and did appear to be genuinely clueless about what he was referring to, but he couldn’t bring himself to believe that. He nearly laughed aloud when she stated he was her boss, but managed to tone it down to a small chuckle. Her explanation had him rolling his eyes and shaking his head. “I’ll bet he’s wanting to know a lot more than that,” he said flatly as he stared at her. His anger was directed more towards Jess than it was at her, but it wasn’t easy to tell. Why wouldn’t Jess want Mia back, after all? Why wouldn’t he try to lure her away and kiss her when no one was around to see it? Hell, maybe he was thinking that if Craig was able to get her back, maybe there was a chance he could prove to Mia that it hadn’t been a wise choice. All it took was some convincing, right? In reality, Craig knew far better than that, but it was hard for him to think logically at the moment.

As her phone made a noise indicating she had received a message, Craig had a hard time keeping himself from snatching it from her. It was clear now that he was obsessed with the idea of Jess and Mia and he knew he didn’t have enough evidence to prove it. Then again, his assumptions always seemed to be enough proof for him, even though they were rarely ever right. He struggled to listen to her. His eyes were fixed on the phone for another moment before his gaze was raised to her face. It was then that he began to feel guilty. She was completely right. She had never done anything to make him question her trust. Sure, he was still hurting from her choice to be with another guy shortly after their last breakup, but she had never done anything to make him question her faithfulness to him while they were dating.

When she mentioned Heather, Craig’s mind drifted to a far different place. Why did she have to put that image in his head? He was currently deprived of sex and the last thing he needed right now was the image of two women going at it. It was very clear to him by now that it didn’t take a whole lot to turn him on, so he hoped she’d be a little more delicate in that respect. However, if she knew that saying that would trigger such thoughts, she’d probably wonder how she ended up with such a pathetic excuse for a boyfriend. “No. I would never….worry about that,” he replied. The thought of a threesome briefly entered his mind before he realized he needed to focus on the subject at-hand. Seriously, what was wrong with him? Could he not have any type of conversation with anyone without being reminded of sex at some point? Clearly he still had to learn how to tame his temptations and be able to think like a mature adult, but it was impossible to know how long that would take.

Casting those thoughts aside, his thoughts went back to the text message. “Aren’t you going to respond?” he said shortly after she had flipped the phone closed. Of course he assumed it was Jess. There was no other possibility in his mind at that moment. He looked at her and narrowed his eyes a bit. “I’m sure he’s dying to hear from you,” he added as he continued to glare at her. He desperately wanted to read it, but he had enough sense to resist this time. Perhaps she didn’t want to respond because she was afraid Craig would take the phone from her and find out something he wasn’t supposed to know? Sure! That must be it… There was no other possibility for it, right? Well, other than the obvious and more practical reasons that Mia had already given him, but other than that…

[Mia Testardo]

Mia couldn’t help but roll her eyes when he repeated the single word of her response. How could he seriously be this upset about her boss calling her? Yeah, she didn’t have much patience right now between being sick and being pregnant she was just done with anything that didn’t go perfectly her way. She was just flat out tired of both. Luckily, she was recovering from her illness fairly quickly, but she still had more than five months left of this pregnancy thing, if everything else as planned. She didn’t understand why she had so few pregnancy symptoms when she was pregnant with Lucas but now she was hit with all of them. Granted, she supposed it was better to have the symptoms this time around, when she had someone to take care of her and, well, medical care, that was always helpful. Once Craig spoke again Mia sighed and her shoulders dropped. She wanted to tease him about the words but her throat was still sore and she didn’t want to say anything about it if it would just make Craig more upset. Right now she just wanted him to calm down and taking about how Jess was also calling to see when the next night she would be spending at his place wouldn’t do that. Still, his accusations were quite humorous and deserved to be made fun of, but she wasn’t going to do it today.

Mia was expecting Craig to get a couple dirty thoughts when Heather was mentioned. She kind of expected it with all guys though; she didn’t have too much faith in the male gender. However, she wasn’t expecting those dirty thoughts to me much more than that, and by no means be enough to turn him on. Just maybe a little image sparked in his mind but there should be no movie played… right? When he spoke, however, all Mia’s hope flew out the window and her eyes rolled to the top of her head. “Damn, I’m dating a perv,” she said softly, resting her face against her hands with her elbows on the table. She had half a mind to ask him if the reason they originally broke up was because he was really looking for someone who claimed by be bisexual so he could have his threesomes and watch some girl on girl actions. She knew a lot of men liked that, but did he really have to say anything that would make her know that?

After she closed the phone and set it down she looked up as Craig as he started to speak again. She gave him a confused look right away, followed by a look somewhere between anger and hurt when he spoke continued. “How to you know he texts me?” she asked, looking down at her phone before glancing up at him once again. “Holy shit, you were looking through my phone, weren’t you?” she asked, her eyes narrowing in anger. Ah, there is was, the oh-so-infamous mood swing. She had been fine two seconds ago, a little annoyed, sure, but who wouldn’t be? Now she was angry and hurt and all over thinking Craig had looked through her phone. She had no proof of that fact, even though he had, but in her mind it was certainly proof enough. He had invaded her privacy, which she had every right to have and now she was going off the rails.

“What the hell Craig! Do you not understand that some things in this house are mine! What next, you gonna start using my tampons?” okay, sure, there weren’t that many tampons in the house at the moment, pregnant and all that, but the point was made. “Damn it! How do you except to be able to father this damn kid of yours if you can’t even trust it’s mother!” Mia let out a loud sigh before standing up from the table, almost knocking the chair down to the ground but managing to catch it without any grace and setting it back up. Yup, poke fun at his parenting abilities, his boyfriend abilities, let’s just be glad she had nothing to say about his abilities in the bedroom. Well, except the fact that she was tired of his thought process always coming from his pants, but she was doing all right when it came to that. That was just the type of man she liked, for some reason.

“Oh fuck it,” she said, tears perking up in her eye, though she couldn’t tell you why. Nothing was making sense in her mind anymore. Everything was swimming, she was light headed and her empty stomach was turning over and over threatening to bring back her morning sickness, but she wasn’t listening to either of that. Instead she just looked to Craig for a second longer before shaking her head and leaving the house, without her purse and only sliding on a pair of flip-flops at the door before leaving at a very brisk walk. As she walked tears started to become stronger and more persistent and her head started to come back to her a little more. Still, she was mad and upset and hurt, but she suddenly questioned her idea of stomping out of the house. Much less stomping out of the house in blue, plaid pajama pants, Craig’s t-shirt, no bra, never even touching her hair, flip flops used for going out to get the newspaper in the rain and still not yet over her mono. Yup, she looked great right now.

She was still crying when she finally got to Cinzetti’s, but didn’t really think about it as she walked in the door. Not long after she did Jess, who was walking by with a folder in his hands, noticed her and stopped his forward motion to look at her for a second. He stared for a second, he hadn’t seen her looking like that since, well, probably ever when it came to the clothes. She hadn’t lived with Jess, of course, so when she was at his place for the night clothing usually wasn’t required. After that moment he walked over, “God Mia, what’s wrong?” he asked, not wanting to touch her without her say so, but obviously having the instinct to. “Craig’s a dick,” was all she said, walking over to an empty bench used for people waiting for tables, quickly followed by Jess, who now did wrap his arm around her and pull her close, which Mia allowed. She no longer had feeling for him, he was a friend comforting her. He asked her if she wanted to talk about it, but that was furthest from her mind. She just wanted comfort, from anyone who would give it and Jess could right now.

[Craig Blackwood]

In a different setting, Craig likely would have laughed at Mia’s response. It was hard to keep his mind clean once ideas like that were put into his head and they both knew that by now. What guy would say no to something like that? He hadn’t meant for his comments to make his thoughts surface so obviously, but that’s exactly how it sounded. He knew his days of having threesomes were well over, but that didn’t keep him from fantasizing, of course. He certainly didn’t have much of anything to complain about concerning their sex life and had no reason to try to make any big changes. He was sure Mia wouldn’t want to have anything to do with him if he started putting more thought and effort into their sex life than he already had. It was already on his mind a bit too often as it was.

Shaking the thoughts from his head once again, he suddenly felt the need to get rather defensive after Mia’s response. “What? No…I mean, well…I just figured he did if he’s been calling you,” he lied, shifting his gaze to the table before hearing her begin to shout at him. The comment about tampons threw him off-guard a bit. That was a bit of a stretch. “What the fuck would I do with a tampon?” he shot back. Clearly he wasn’t exactly grasping the point here, but after a few more seconds it registered. Before he was able to attempt to elaborate on the subject, however, Mia spoke again, this time saying something about his fathering ability. He honestly didn’t think it would cut him so deep, but it did. Over the past few months he had been nothing but concerned about his ability to be a good father and now Mia was just reinforcing those thoughts. He looked towards the ground and struggled to find something to say. He hadn’t expected the conversation to turn out this way. Then again, what could he expect when he made accusations with little proof whatsoever?

Before he could figure out what to do, he watched Mia storm out of the house. Part of him wanted to go after her, but then decided against it. They were both angry and Craig needed a minute to figure out what he would say to her if he were to go after her. He had just blindly accused her of something that had no truth to it and so it made perfect sense for her to be upset, but he still hadn’t expected a reaction like that. He hadn’t pushed her on it too much, at least not up to that point. Sure, he had planned to be more persistent, but now that just seemed stupid. He sat on the couch and allowed himself to calm down a bit while he sorted through what had just happened in his mind. It was several minutes later when Craig finally decided to start looking for her. He now regretted not going after her sooner considering the condition she was in, but obviously his mind was in other places.

He had no clue where she had gone, so he decided to check a few of her friends’ places before heading to Cinzetti’s. There was still a small part of him that was thinking there was something going on between Mia and Jess, so if he had been right, that’s who she would go to first, right? He didn’t know where Jess lived (a secret that should always be kept from him) and so the next place that he was likely to be would be his work. Even if Mia wasn’t there, surely it couldn’t hurt to ask Jess a few questions? Ok, maybe that wasn’t the best idea. Craig had yet to have a conversation one on one with Jess and that hardly seemed like a good start. He pulled his BMW into the parking lot. There were only a handful of people there, given the time of day, which would hopefully make it easier to find out whether or not Mia was there.

As he walked through the doors, Craig had simply expected to ask the first employee he saw about Mia. However, that thought quickly vanished when he immediately spotted her sitting next to Jess on a bench near the hostess stand. “What the fuck!” he blurted, now flying with jealous rage. He spun around and began pacing in the other direction before walking back towards them. “You know what? That’s fine. He can fucking father the baby. Is that what you want?” he said with his voice raised, but not to the point where he was shouting. Clearly he was now convinced that there was something between them and it was difficult to have complete control of his thoughts or actions at the moment. His gaze turned to Jess and it was hardly a friendly one. A sharp glare was given to Craig’s apparent enemy before turning to look at Mia again. He could hardly remain still, so he found himself pacing a bit every few seconds. He wanted to storm out of the restaurant, but something was keeping him there. He wasn’t exactly sure what to think right now.

[Mia Testardo]

The longer Mia sat there with Jess, the more obvious it was to her that her reaction had been a little extreme. Sure, she had every right to be upset, he was accusing her of cheating which was something she would never do, especially after he had been unfaithful to her. She didn’t want to cause him the same pain she had felt, which was why she was so upset he would never consider the fact that she had been with Jess since she got back together with him, but still, stomping out of the house still didn’t make a lot of sense when she allowed her mind to put it all into perspective. She was slowly starting to realize that she had overreacted, but she wouldn’t diagnose her own mood swing. A part of her was still trying to deny the idea of pregnancy symptoms other than the ones she’s couldn’t avoid, like the morning sickness, but in all reality, yeah, her hormones were messing up her brain.

If she had been thinking with more of her right mind she would realize that it was probably a bad idea to be as close to Jess as she was at the moment. She had always told Craig to consider it cheating if he was doing something that he felt he could not tell her about. Then again, she was right up to Jess like this because Craig had treated her so poorly, in her mind, that it may be all right, at least for now. Yeah, of course it wasn’t, especially since she knew Craig was insecure when it came to Jess. Granted, she had no intention of allowing Craig to see this. She just needed to be comforted right now before she could go talk to Craig, who would also hopefully calm down in the time she was away. Yelling at each other did not help the situation so having a little time for them both to collect their thoughts had to be a good thing.

Well, of course that was before Craig came into the restaurant and saw them. Mia had had her head down when he drove up and walked towards the door, otherwise she was sure she would have noticed him drive up or come in, but as it was she only jerked her head up after his original exclamation. The second he said something Mia went to push Jess away and slid over to the other side of the bench. Yeah, Mia, not making yourself look exactly innocent, are you? But it was her first instinct. She knew she hadn’t done anything wrong, except maybe allowing Jess to comfort her in the way in which he was, so she wasn’t sure why she was starting to get so defensive. Whatever Craig thought was happening between them wasn’t happening. They were coworkers and were just starting to be friends again after the break up. She understood why Craig would rather her not be around Jess, but since she did like her job there was nothing she could do to get around it so she did wish he would just start trusting her over the matter. She was over Jess, that was all there is to it, and she never liked him as much as she did Craig and she did wish she had never been with him, but she couldn’t go back in time so she had to learn to deal with it just like Craig did and she thought she may be coping just a little better.

“Craig! Shh!” Mia complained as he mentioned something about the baby. Jess didn’t know about the baby, in fact, before this no one in the restaurant except Tanya, Heather and Cindy knew about the baby but that was now changed. “What baby?” Jess turned over to ask, interrupting the fight, but Mia just shook her head. “It’s nothing, don’t worry about it,” she said, standing up from her seat and taking a step towards her enraged boyfriend, even though he wasn’t really standing still. Jess tried to protest not being told anything, but Mia ignored him. “Craig, baby, you’re being irrational. Nothing’s going on, you’re the only man I want in my life, and in our baby’s life,” she paused for a second and bit her lip, running a hand through her messy hair and getting it stuck in a few tangles as she did, just pulling her hand out of her head instead of trying to work her fingers through it. She took a deep breath before reaching out to grab his arm, but before she could Jess did the same.

“Craig, you’ve gotta calm down,” Jess said immediately, pulling at Craig’s arm to try and get him to turn towards him before letting go of the limb. “I don’t know what’s going on with you two, but you should not be treating her like this. And whatever you think is happening is not happening,” he tried to convince, looking his counterpart in the eye. “Jess, thanks but… I have it under control,” Mia once again tried to say through her tears. Jess gave a scoff and stayed where he was, but did nod to tell her he would butt out. How had her life seemed so fine when she first went down to see what Craig had wanted and now she was more than worried that she was going to lose the love of her life and the father of her child all in one afternoon over a misunderstanding. This wasn’t fair, and wasn’t good for the baby. She didn’t need all this stress, but there was little she could do about it. She had to try and convince Craig nothing was going on between her and Jess, but Craig wasn’t an easy man to convince, stubborn as he was.

“He’s right though,” she tried to convince once again, stepping forward and taking his hand in hers, hoping he wouldn’t pull away. “There’s nothing going on. I… can’t you just trust me? I’m so sorry you’re hurting, and I’m sorry I made you think something was up, but I’d never be unfaithful to you, please just…” she broke off, looking down towards the flip flops on her feet, somewhat scared to look towards him. As she stood there she once again realized how bad she felt and how the mono as well as the pregnancy was affecting her. She was light headed and slightly sick to her stomach and really would love to get a ride back home from Craig and cuddle up in their bed, but who knew if that was going to happen anytime soon.

[Craig Blackwood]

It was still hard for Craig to accept the fact that Mia had proven that she could easily find a man that was more mature and probably a much better boyfriend than he was. This was his first serious relationship and he simply wasn’t used to having to worry about any competition. All the things that used to matter in his world involved sex and now he had to accomplish far more than being good in the bedroom in order to keep Mia from finding someone else. It was easy for him to be overly confident about how good he was at pleasing a woman, but the other areas of the relationship were a far different story for him. When it came to being a sensitive, caring, and committed boyfriend that was willing to compromise, Craig felt he was pretty close to failing in those areas. Hell, he couldn’t even come up with his own ideas on how to be romantic when their anniversary or her birthday came along. Most of the suggestions came from the women he worked with, but he did happen to take credit for them most of the time.

Seeing Jess holding Mia like that was extremely painful to see, especially given the current circumstances. He was jealous and suspicious of the two of them, yes, but there was also fear. He had come very close to losing her only a few months back and he couldn’t help but worry that she would eventually want to leave him for good. He knew he really sucked as a boyfriend sometimes, but he was trying. The commitment things still scared him and the thought of having a baby with Mia was something he had yet to get used to, but he was doing his best to cope. As scared as he was, he couldn’t bring himself to run out on Mia and leave her to raise the baby alone and the thought of someone else taking over as the baby’s father was enough to lose an insane amount of sleep over. He had a responsibility to her and the baby and it didn’t make sense to leave the woman he was crazy in love with, no matter what happened. Perhaps now was a good time to start reading up on parenting books, but reading in general was hard enough for Craig to commit to in any fashion, so it would be a challenge. Then again, if he didn’t learn something about how to take care of his own child, he only increased the chances of Mia leaving him, in his mind.

Craig hadn’t thought at all about the fact that Mia hadn’t told very many people about the pregnancy yet. He knew that to some extent, but it was hard to focus on the little details right now. Besides, he still had it in his head that there was something going on between them, so why wouldn’t he know about the baby, right? Craig had told a few people at work, but only the people he was closest to at work. It wasn’t something he liked to draw too much attention to, especially with all of his insecurities at this point. He knew of a lot of people, particularly some guy friends, who would laugh upon hearing he was going to be a dad. Then again, he honestly couldn’t blame them for it. He wasn’t exactly the type of guy anyone could picture having a family just yet and it would probably be hard for anyone to picture him as a father. Craig was still trying to imagine it himself. When Jess asked about the mention of a baby, Craig felt himself begin to panic. Either Jess was putting on an act, or Craig had made one huge mistake. Unfortunately, the latter seemed obvious. His gaze shifted to Mia as she spoke and as much as Craig wanted to believe her, there was still that part of him that was too stubborn to back down now, especially in front of Jess. Of course, he would look better if he did concede, but Craig apparently didn’t understand that just yet.

He nearly built up the ability to apologize, but the thought quickly vanished when Jess took a step towards him and grabbed his arm. Craig quickly took his arm back and stepped away from Mia’s ex. When Jess spoke, it tempted Craig to grab him by the throat and fling him across the room. “Well excuse me, Mr. Perfect, but why don’t you mind your own fucking business,” he growled, glaring at Jess and breathing a bit heavier than normal. It wasn’t so much that he was angry about the possibility of Jess being involved with Mia in any way, it was now the fact that Jess had said anything to him at all. In Craig’s mind, Jess was trying to win Mia over when in reality Jess was simply trying to look out for her, as a friend. When Mia stepped towards him, he had half a mind to step back from her, but had enough sense to stay where he was. He allowed her to take his hand and he could feel the small tug at his heart as he looked at her. His heart and mind were in far different places at that moment, leaving him feeling a bit confused and uncertain.

“Mia, I…” he started to say something to her, but cut himself off as he looked over at Jess again. For once Craig would like to see a side of Jess that made him feel just a little more secure. It was hard for him to come up with reasons for why Mia hadn’t just stayed with the other man. It was still hard for him to believe that Mia would pass up a guy that seemed so perfect for a guy who could barely go a day without mentioning sex in some form or another. Now with the baby on the way, Craig felt Mia would be able to find enough flaws in his fathering ability to finally realize that she deserved much better. He looked back at Mia after a moment. There was a slight trembling of his lip as his emotions threatened to get the better of him in a different form. “Can we…talk in the car?” he said as he glanced over at Jess once again before looking back at Mia. He obviously wasn’t comfortable talking about anything in front of Jess, unless they were talking about something that would put Jess in a negative light, of course.

He waited for her to agree before taking her hand more firmly in his and leading her outside. His suspicions were fading, mostly because he had very little reason to believe them anymore. He could tell by the look in her eyes that Mia was being completely honest with him, and he had no reason to doubt her. Once they reached the car he waited until each of them had closed the doors before figuring out what he wanted to say. He took a deep breath and fought back tears. It was extremely rare for him to cry in front of anyone for any reason and so it always caught him a bit off guard when he lost it like this. “I…I don’t know if I can do this. I mean, a father? How the hell can I be a father? I just…I don’t want to screw up, but I know I will,” he said, resting his forehead against the steering wheel. His thoughts were a bit jumbled as he tried to make sense of the way he felt. “I’m sorry. I know there’s nothing between you and Jess, but…” he took a deep breath and cleared his throat as it began to tighten a little. “He was right, you know. I shouldn’t treat you like that. Fuck, of course he’s right!” he said as if he was suddenly angry with his own realization, partially due to once again feeling inferior to Jess. “How the hell am I supposed to be a father when I can’t even treat you right?” he asked as he shook his head and banged his head against the steering wheel lightly a few times. He wasn’t going to look at her because he figured he just looked pathetic and helpless and his ego still told him it wasn’t okay to let others see you cry.

[Mia Testardo]

Though Mia had accepted the fact that Craig was jealous and did have a basic understanding of why he was jealous, she really just didn’t get his worry. She had already chosen him over Jess once and would do it again in a heartbeat. Sure, Jess may be more mature n certain aspects but that wasn’t what she was looking for. Whether Craig realized it or not he was very caring and was nice and committed to. He had tried multiple times to keep their relationship going when he was a little rocky and, sure, he wasn’t ready to get married and all that, but neither was she. She just expected him to be faithful and respectful in the relationship, which he was. And caring, well, she felt that in him as well. It was obvious that he cared for her and wanted to make her happy and comfortable, and he did a fine job with that as well. Sensitive, well, let’s just say that was one we had to work on. He wasn’t good at showing his emotions, no matter what they were and while this did bother her from time to time it was no means detrimental to their relationship.

It really was difficult for Mia to pin down exactly why she was with Craig, or why she had the feelings of love she had for him. She loved his sense of humor and she knew that was a big part of it. Jess had to work hard to make her laugh, he was so serious most of the time, but Craig brought a smile to her face with everything he did. Then there was the fact that he let her have her independence without coming off as uncaring. He ask where she was going and who she was with, but generally didn’t care what the answer was (well, unless the answer to the latter was Jess, but… she supposed he had a reason). All in all, the best way to explain her feelings was that being around Craig made her happy. She looked forward to the times they were both at home and loved doing anything with him, even something as tedious as cleaning the house or grocery shopping. However, she did know that if she could pin down why she would rather be with him and with Jess it may help his jealous feelings, but it was so hard to put into words. She loved Craig, what else was there to say?

“Craig!” Mia screeched after he insulted Jess. Sure, she knew he had wanted to really yell at him for some time now, she supposed she understood if she switched their places, but did he seriously have to do it now, where she worked? The last thing she wanted to do was make a scene that would attract the attention of someone else she worked with. She didn’t need a rumor going around about how she had some huge fight with her boyfriend because she was back together with Jess or whatever else could come from this. She ran a hand over her face out of nothing but annoyance and worry. She didn’t know what she would do if Craig wouldn’t believe her and decided he didn’t want to be with her anymore or whatever else. She knew her friends would take care of her and wouldn’t let her end back up on the street or anything (unlike her “friends” the first time) but she knew she wouldn’t be able to be a mother on her own. In fact, if Craig did back out, and didn’t want to have anything to do with the baby, she would probably move her focus back onto adoption. She couldn’t be a single mother and she had enough head on her shoulders to know that so she just hoped that Craig would come to his senses so she wouldn’t have to worry about something like that happening.

Mia gave her eyes a small roll when she noticed him glance over to Jess. Of course he couldn’t talk about his feelings in front of her ex, that would be the most horrible thing in the world, right? After a moment’s paused when he asked about the car she nodded and allowed her to lead him out. “I’ll,” she started, stopping her forward motion to make Craig wait for her, “explain later, I guess,” she said softly in Jess’ direction, pushing hair from her face before starting to move out the door of the restaurant and towards Craig’s BMW. Every time they got in the car she couldn’t help but wonder how Craig was going to react to putting a car seat in the back, be he’d have to get used to the idea, or at least she hoped. She let herself into the car, something else she liked about Craig, she really would rather do things like that herself, and sat down before closing the door behind her and resting her back against the back of the seat. Between pregnancy and mono she didn’t exactly have a lot of stamina at the moment.

When Craig started to talk she made sure to listen carefully to what he had to say. She gave him a slightly confused look when he voiced his worries, though. She was expecting something about Jess and instead he was focusing on their baby, which she couldn’t complain about but it did confuse her, and then worried her when she realized he was talking about how he didn’t think he could be a father. It wasn’t as if she wasn’t worried about both their parenting ability as well, but she did wish he would sound a little more confident that they could raises a nice, healthy, well adjusted child together. “Craig, I…” she was cut off and allowed him to finish what he had to say, but when he did and began hitting his head on the steering wheel she quickly moved over and put her hand between his head and his instrument for self abuse, though she knew he couldn’t be hurting himself too badly if at all. “Babe, don’t do that,” she said softly, asking him to turn so he could look at her with a hand on his cheek, but knowing he may not be too inclined to do so. She did like to see his emotions, but it really hurt her that he was so close to tears. She didn’t want him to feel like that, that wasn’t what she wanted at all.

Mia didn’t know where to start so bit her lip for a moment before deciding to go with the first thing that came to her mind. “Craig, you know as well as he does that… that all that yelling or whatever isn’t all right. I’m not gonna say I’m okay with it by all means, but I do understand. We both say things we don’t mean from time to time, and it’s going to happen, even though I’d rather it not, and it’s going to hurt. It’s just important that we forgive each other when it does happen, and when we have the baby that we never fight like that in front of it,” he said, as she moved over so she was sitting between the seats, mostly, and cuddled right up to him, asking to be held. “And I’m going to screw things up too, I don’t know how to be a mother. It’s going to be a learning experience, for both of us, but we’ll figure it out. As long as we’re not idiots about it I’m sure it’ll all be fine,” she said softly, putting her face up to his neck and opening her eyes for a moment to see Jess waiting at the restaurant door, probably to make sure everything really was all right. She gave him a small wave to tell him everything was under control, when he smirked towards her and left to go back into the restaurant and continue his job.

“Is this really all about the baby?” she asked, moving so she could look in his eyes. “Or is something else bothering you?” she forced a smile towards him before resting her head back against his body and reaching out for his hand. “I just… I don’t really understand why you’re so upset, and I hate seeing you like this,” she reached up towards his face and brushed away the tears she imagined could be clinging to his cheeks. She paused for a moment before finally deciding to say it. “Is it still Jess? At all? I know it’s a sensitive topic and all, but I figure we may as well pull it up when we’re talking about everything else,” she finally finished, with a deep sigh though her nose. Her throat hurt, she was tired of talking and would love to go back to bed, but her relationship was more important than the fact that she needed to go back to bed at this time in the afternoon.

[Craig Blackwood]

It was always hard for Craig to hold back when it came to flinging insults at Jess or whatever else, but considering his apparent hatred for the man, he wasn’t doing so bad. All of the things that Craig was always tempted to say to Jess hadn’t come out at this point, so that had to be a good thing. Of course, a big part of that was the fact that Craig didn’t have any ammunition against Jess, which was making things all the more frustrating for him. He wouldn’t dare ask Mia any details about when she was dating Jess, but it certainly didn’t seem as though he had mistreated her or been anything but a gentleman, especially since he was still friends with Mia. Craig had a hell of a time sorting out his thoughts and feelings on this issue. There wasn’t really a good reason for him to hate Jess and it certainly had nothing to do with the kind of guy Jess was. Anyone could take Jess’s place in the situation and Craig most likely wouldn’t feel any differently. It was possible that he’d get over it eventually and be able to talk to Jess respectfully, but right now that seemed almost impossible.

Now that there was no reason for him to believe that there was something going on between Mia and Jess, it was difficult to avoid his feelings behind it all. Yes, he was jealous and was still having trouble dealing with the fact that Mia still worked with her ex, but there were also other things that were fueling his frustration. He had never been the type of guy to share his feelings up front and it often caused problems in the relationship, such as him accusing Mia of something that she clearly didn’t do. The insecurities he was feeling about being a good boyfriend as well as a good father were becoming more and more of a burden for him and he didn’t know how to handle them. Sure, it would have been a lot wiser to just talk to Mia about all of it sooner, but somehow he never liked the idea. His pride often got in the way of things like that and it certainly didn’t help that his friends weren’t exactly the best people to talk to about these kinds of things. As far as they were concerned, talking about one’s feelings was a sign of weakness and somehow made you less of a man. Fortunately, Craig was learning a lot from his relationship with Mia so he usually knew enough not to listen to advice from men who weren’t currently in a serious relationship.

He stopped banging his head against the steering wheel as Mia moved over to stop him. His eyes were cast downwards as she turned his face towards her. It was stupid for him to be ashamed of showing his emotions, and a part of him knew that, but it was a hard to simply shake the habits he had developed throughout his life even though there were several he was able to break since the beginning of his relationship with Mia. He listened closely to what she was saying to him and nodded to show he agreed. The thought of fighting in front of the baby gave him more reason to change the way he dealt with his feelings. Letting it build up like he did was never a good idea because there was no way to predict when he would reach his breaking point. The baby deserved to grow up in a loving home and it was hard to have a home like that if its parents were constantly arguing in front of it, or if their dad was acting like a child half the time.

As she moved closer to him, he wrapped an arm around her. He had no idea that such a simple gesture would help him so much. It hadn’t occurred to him that being close to her was exactly the kind of reassurance he needed at that moment. He knew that she cared about him and she had never failed to show it, yet he was stupid enough to doubt their relationship. He held her close to him as he listened to her speak. It really helped to be reminded that they were in this together and it was going to be a learning experience for the both of them. However, he did feel that Mia would make a much better parent than he would, but that couldn’t be a bad thing, right? As long as the kid had at least one competent parent, everything would be just fine, wouldn’t it? “Yeah I guess…I guess you’re right,” he said, though he still wasn‘t entirely sure he agreed. Of course, tt didn’t do any good for him to start having doubts about the pregnancy because there wasn’t anything either of them could do to change it. He had a responsibility to the baby and its mother and abandoning that responsibility would be the worst possible thing he could ever do. Mia was far too important to him for him to allow that to happen. He just wasn’t sure how he was going to handle it, but as soon as he received a bit of education on the subject, he was bound to feel a lot better about everything.

It took him a minute or two to really think about her questions because he wasn’t sure he knew the answers. As much as he wanted to get over the fact that she had been with Jess, he hadn’t been able to do so as of yet. It wasn’t just the fact that she had been with another man, but he figured it had more to do with the fact that it had happened so soon after they had broken up. It didn’t seem to matter at the time because it took Craig a while to realize just how much he wanted to be with Mia, but now it really seemed to affect him. He looked at her and sighed gently as she finished speaking. “It still stings a bit, I guess. I’m not sure why, but it does,” he said, referring to her relationship with Jess. “I mean, whenever I see you two in the same room…or if you happen to mention his name, I just…god, I don’t know. And seeing him holding you in the restaurant…it just reminds me of how easy it would be for you to find someone else if I screw up too badly,“ he admitted, clearly still very insecure about the subject. “And now, well, I guess I’m just so worried that I won’t be a good father that I let those two things get kinda mixed up and for some reason it made sense for you to want someone else to…well, never mind. It’s stupid, I know and I’m sorry for giving you so much crap about something that didn’t happen,” he told her, even though his thoughts weren’t entirely clear and he still wasn’t entirely convinced that nothing at all had happened between her and Jess in the past few weeks, especially after seeing him so close to her in the restaurant.

If he took more time to think about it, he would hopefully realize how silly this all was, but at the moment he still couldn’t get the idea out of his head. At least he wasn’t openly accusing her at this point, right? He looked back towards the restaurant to make sure Jess was nowhere to be seen at that moment before turning back to look at Mia again, his eyes still a little teary. “Mia if you…if you ever feel like this isn’t going to work, like…if you think someone else might be better at this whole father thing or whatever, then I don’t want to get in the way of that. I really love you and you deserve the best, so I guess if it made you happy…” he got a little choked up towards the end of his sentence, thus being unable to finish his thought, but his line of thinking was fairly obvious. It was unfortunate that he didn’t realize that what he was saying would do more damage than good because it was absolutely ridiculous. He knew she cared about him, yet he was still doubting that she wanted to be with him because he might not be the best father in the world? Yeah, he’s just a little mixed up right now.

[Mia Testardo]

Mia had found that Craig’s pride often got in the way of a lot of things. If they could actually talk about some of the problems that came up in their they may be able to avoid fighting about some of those problems. They did fight a bit more than they should, or at least she thought so, but she was hoping to work on that before their child came into the world. Or at least be able to keep their voices down and wait to keep the argument until later. However, it would help if he could just talk about his feelings. Be able to admit that he was hurt or jealous and then they could work on why or what she could do to make it better. She did feel she just let him know when something as bothering her because, well, he had a hard time reading between the lines in her opinion. If she didn’t tell him exactly what was upsetting her he was just sitting there questioning why he wasn’t getting into her pants that night instead of asking about it. There was that pride again. However, that wasn’t something she loved about him. If he didn’t have that ego about him he wouldn’t be the same man, and whether he could get it through his head or not, she loved the man he was, not the one he may or may not be able to be.

Once she moved closer to him she wasn’t sure if she was expecting any reciprocation, so was very happy when he held her close instead of trying to move away, even though he had nowhere to go. I felt so great to have Craig hold her close instead of Jess to try and comfort her or whatever else. She gently pressed her face into Craig’s shoulder and wrapped an arm up so it rested against his chest. “I am,” she teased slightly when he said something about her being right. Mia had to admit that she still worried, from time to time, that Craig would leave her to raise the baby on her own, and worrying about that was not good for the baby she was carrying. It didn’t help her to hear him worry about his parenting ability either. She needed him to show some confidence in his child so she could feel more confident in their relationship. She knew she would never leave him, but there was little she could do if he decided to leave, and that terrified her. She hated worrying about that because Craig was the only one she wanted and, though he thought it would be easy for her to find another man to father the child, most men around their age weren’t too excited about fathering a child that wasn’t biologically theirs.

“Craig… no,” she started about how she could find someone else before pausing when he continued to speak. She didn’t want anyone else. Why couldn’t he get that? When he finally admitted it was stupid she scoffed and nodded, agreeing with him. “Craig, babe, I want you. I just… I wish I could find a way to make you believe that. I really regret everything that… that happened with Jess. I wish I wouldn’t have done that, especially so quickly, but hind sight is twenty-twenty. I can’t change it now, but I really wish I could because, well, it was stupid first of all and I hate knowing that he hurts you,” she sighed deeply and looked down, putting a hand on her stomach as she thought about the baby growing inside. She didn’t want the baby coming into the world when its parents were having difficulties in their relationship; no child deserved that, so she knew they were going to have to work this out as soon as possible. “Nothing happened though, I’d never… I’d never do that to you, not like I would want to,” she pushed her face into his neck again before kissing it a few times, then closing her eyes again. A part of her was even slightly annoyed that he didn’t make the connection that, before she had gotten sick, they had been having sex nearly every night. Did he really think she was doing that and getting some on the side as well? Granted it would be nice if he didn’t have to think about that because he believed she would never be unfaithful to him.

“What?” she questioned as he continued to speak, a look of confusion on her face. What was he saying? It made no sense at all. Tears started forming in her eyes again, just at the thought of losing him. “Craig, I love you, and I don’t want anyone else in my life, or in our baby’s life. I love you so, please, stop talking like that,” she said, looking up at him with tears in her eyes before resting her head back on his shoulder and trying to hold back tears. “You make me so happy, and I know you can make the child happy too. I just… I need you to be a little more confident in this, and in us. Please,” she paused for a while, not sure what to say anymore so instead just stayed close to her boyfriend, hoping he would hold her close and reassure her. After a few more moments something else came to her mind, which worried her even more.

“Do you… you want to do this, right? I mean… you do want to be a father for your child… yeah?” she asked, pulling away slightly so she could look at him, tears now flooding her eyes once again. This realization scared her. She didn’t know what she would do if Craig had changed his mind about either the child, or the relationship. She couldn’t do this on her own, and she knew adoption was always an option but she did wish Craig would just say it if that’s what he was thinking because this whole back and forth thing was driving her crazy. “I just… are you trying to get out of this? You can just tell me… but I really don’t want to lose you. I love you more than anything so… tell me what you really want, please,” she said, with a deep sigh to try and keep her breathing somewhat normally.